When You Think Of Happiness
by the real vampire
Summary: SPD. He said the way my blue eyes shined put the stars to shame that night... Three years after leaving New Tech, Syd is back at SPD remembering a perfect summer that had left her heart broken. One shot.


**Disclaimer. **I don't own any of the characters in this story, much as I'd like to. Don't sue me.

**A.N.** This ficlet was inspired by Taylor Swift's song "Tim McGraw". It's been an idea I had floating around for a while and have finally had time to bring it to life. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I did writing it.

_the real vampire_

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**When You Think of Happiness**

The room looked exactly as she had left it. Clothes still hung neatly in the wardrobe; books were still stacked on her shelves, pictures in glass frames still stood on her desk. The same; though now covered in a thin layer of dust. Even her bed remained as she had left it, untouched in the three years she had been gone. Three years… it didn't seem it. Not a day had passed in the time she had been away that she hadn't thought of SPD, or him.

Dropping her suitcase on the floor she moved over to the window, opening it to let some fresh air in. As she did, she knocked against one of the photos on her desk. It fell; face down against the wooden surface. Picking it up, she absently wiped off the layer of dust coating the glass and stared at the two smiling faces that looked back at her. _They had been so happy_… Shrugging off the feeling of melancholy that threatened to engulf her, she carefully set the picture back onto her desk and turned back to her suitcase to begin the task of unpacking.

Two hours later saw her sitting on the floor surrounded by piles of old clothes and books, sorting through what she no longer wanted. She had started out with good intentions but had found herself easily distracted, lost in fond memories of the past as she looked through her old possessions. They seemed to belong to a different era, a different person. Time changes all things, and she knew she was no longer that girl who had left here.

Reaching under her bed she pulled out another box, at first glance like all the rest. Opening it, she saw the faded denim and her heart sank. Slowly, almost unwillingly, she removed and unfolded the pair of jeans, glancing underneath at what she knew the box contained; more memories. Photos of the two of them that she hadn't been able to bear looking at, a cd of their favourite songs, gifts and letters he had given her… A piece of paper fell from the pocket of the jeans as she made to refold them. Reaching down she picked it up and recognised her own, tidy hand. Reading the brief few lines, she found herself transported back to a time she had tried to forget, to a perfect summer and to a man who had broken her heart…

_--XxX--_

The blue Chevy truck let out another ominous shudder before the engine spluttered and finally died. Sky let out a curse as he jumped down from the driver's seat and kicked the vehicle on his way to look under the hood. "Damn stupid thing," he growled as he surveyed the damage.

"Overheated again?" a soft female voice asked from the passenger seat, a hint of amusement in her tone.

Sky turned and nodded as the door opened and Syd stepped lightly down from the truck, dressed in a pair of old, faded blue jeans and pale pink button-down shirt. "It's old," he said, as if in explanation.

Syd smiled, "That's the third time this week," she remarked, but she didn't dare to suggest he got a new truck. His 1984 model was ancient, yet he refused to upgrade it to a modern car. It was his baby. Instead she ran a hand through her loose blonde curls and waited for him to fix it. The road was dark and unlit, a good few miles from New Tech in the mainly uninhabited countryside that surrounded the city, but the full moon cast enough light to see by. It wasn't quite the height of summer yet and already the air was unbearably hot and humid. The pink ranger leaned against the side of Sky's truck and shut her eyes as a cool breeze gave her a fleeting respite from the heat and let her mind wander. It had only been a month since the final battle that had defeated Gruumm, and yet it felt like longer. A lot had changed since then. Jack had left SPD and moved in with his girlfriend, Sky and Bridge had been promoted and they had a new member of the team, Aaron a young eighteen-year old from Ireland that had been enlisted as the new green ranger. With his sense of humour and genuine enthusiasm, he had fitted in beautifully. Syd had thought it might have been weird trying to get used to everyone in their new roles, but the transaction had been surprisingly easy. And there hadn't just been a change in their professional lives… A smile crossed Syd's face as she heard another muffled curse from the front of the truck. A shadow passed over her and she opened her eyes to see Sky standing in front of her, his dark blonde hair an unruly mess and his red t-shirt clinging to his torso from the stickiness of the night air. She raised an eyebrow, "Well?"

He gave her a helpless shrug, "I can't do anything about it right now. It needs to cool down. But there's no need to worry," he added quickly, "It's not that far to the lake. By the time we get back it should be ok."

Syd grinned, "Ok then. One sec," she called as he moved to walk away. He stopped and watched as she pulled off the pink sling-back heels she was wearing and chucked them through the passenger window. The tarmac was warm but not uncomfortable beneath her bare feet and she smiled, "That's better. You and I have very different ideas of what 'not far' is, and I'm not risking my feet."

Sky laughed at that and held out his hand to her. She smiled and took it, feeling a thrill rush through her at the touch. Now _this_, this was new and unexpected, but far from unwelcome. It had first happened at the ball thrown for B-Squad to celebrate Gruumm's defeat. The team was in mixed spirits, with Jack's announcement that he was leaving slightly dampening the mood of the evening. Syd had fretted for ages over what to wear that night and had finally decided on a little black number, and it had been worth it just for the look on Sky's face as he saw her in that dress. The new red ranger had been stunned and Syd had caught him sneaking glances at her throughout the night. She had been dancing with Z and some of the other female cadets when one of her favourite songs, a Tim McGraw country ballad, had come on and Sky had appeared beside her. Rather nervously he had asked for a dance and that was how Syd had found herself with her head resting on his chest moving slowly across the floor. That moment had seemed to last forever.

They hadn't kissed, or shared some passé night of passion. It had just been that one dance to that one song. Yet it had felt much more than that; it had _been_ much more than that. During the fight against Gruumm there had been no time for personal relationships, no room for feelings other than friendship, because they had all been painfully aware that one of them could have been lost at any moment. When you're fighting to save the world, your own desires have to take a back seat until its safe. Yes, Syd had thought of Sky in ways other than teammates and friends, but only fleetingly, in the private of her own mind and such thoughts had been swiftly pushed aside. They had to be. Trying to stay alive in battle has the effect of making sure any romantic notions are quickly forgotten. But now, with her head resting against Sky's chest and feeling the beating of his heart beneath his shirt, Syd had allowed herself to hope.

Sky hadn't said much to her the next morning at breakfast but he had joined her for lunch, and then dinner. The next day he had shyly suggested they eat off base and had taken her to a lovely little art house café, the sort that Syd would never have imagined Sky knowing about. That week had been strange, but a pleasant sort of strange where after thinking you know someone well you realised you've only seen one side to them, and their other sides are even more pleasing that you thought. With the defeat of Gruumm and Sky's promotion to red ranger it was as if a new aspect of the young man could emerge, one that had been buried under expectations and pressures that he had put on himself. He had made no further move on her though, other than a few, brief clasps of her hand. It had all been very chaste, very gentlemanly. Syd wanted more.

So when Sky had asked her if she fancied a drive that evening into the country after their shift finished she'd practically jumped at it. And now… well Sky's truck was always breaking down so it was hardly unexpected. But Sky had promised the lake wasn't far and, with his big hand gently holding hers and the tarmac warm if slightly sticky beneath her feet, Syd didn't really care. She could have walked forever.

It wasn't far. Ten minutes down the road Sky turned off down a smaller track. Soon grass replaced the hardness of the lane, pleasantly cool compared to the still-hot night air. The ground gently sloped downwards towards the lake, the water completely still, reflecting the large moon and stars like a mirror. Sky turned to her in the pale moonlight and grinned, "You like?"

"It's beautiful Sky," Syd said, returning the smile in kind. They made their way down to the soft sandy beach and stood staring at the calm waters lapping the shore. Syd absently put her hands to the back of her neck and pushed her hair up to allow air to reach her skin. It was such a warm night, but the lake did offer a faint breeze and nearby trees further cooled the air. Much more pleasant than the claustrophobic stuffiness of the city.

"Do you want to dance?"

Sky's voice was soft, but lacked the insecurity that had been there recently. It pulled Syd out of the reverie she had fallen into, the peacefulness of the lake sending her thoughts skittering in all directions at once. She looked at the young man beside her, her brow creasing slightly in puzzlement, "There's no music."

Sky shrugged, "So?" He held out a hand to her. A smile grew on Syd's face as she took it, a silent acceptance of his offer. Sky pulled her close to him, one arm snaking around her waist to hold her firmly, the other keeping a hold of her hand. He stood, tall and confident as he slowly began to move with her, no trace of the unsure and nervous young man that he had been in the last couple of weeks. It was as if, after some inner struggle, he had accepted his feelings towards his pink ranger and was once again his cocky, assured self. Sky smiled down at her and Syd couldn't help but respond, a faint blush appearing on her cheeks. She dragged her eyes away from his and looked out over the moonlit lake, her gaze rising to the clear sky. The silence suddenly seemed deafening to her ears and the compulsion to say something, anything to alleviate it came upon her. Sky beat her to it.

"You look beautiful tonight, Syd," he whispered, his breath tickling the side of her face.

Her blush deepened, "Don't be silly," she said back, in what she hoped was a no-nonsense tone though inside her heart was doing somersaults. "The stars are beautiful. This place is beautiful. I-"

She was cut off by Sky releasing her hand and pressing a finger to her lips. "Syd, the way your blue eyes shine tonight they put the stars to shame."

For a second the pink ranger was stunned. After what seemed like an age, she found her voice, "That's a lie." It came out a breathless whisper.

Sky shook his head, "I'd never lie to you." Their faces were close, only inches of hot summer air separating them. It was Syd that closed the distance, bringing her lips to Sky's with a forcefulness that surprised them both. That kiss had marked the beginning of a wonderful night and set them on a path that neither one of them would forget. But thoughts of the future were far from the two rangers that night; only the present mattered. Syd had been woken early the next morning by the first flickers of day, fingers of pale pink and yellow that reached from the east, an indication that the sun was not far behind. The air had cooled even further overnight, but now heat was beginning to be felt with the first brushes of dawn and there was a musky smell to the air, a sure sign that another stifling hot day was about to begin. As consciousness grew, she became aware of her position. She was laying next to Sky, curled up in the crook of his arm, head on his shoulder and her right hand splayed across his chest. She could feel his heartbeat under her fingers and the rise and fall of his torso with each breath he took. Her gaze travelled up, following the line of his throat to his chin and lips and then to his eyes. They were half-open, a dreamy expression on his face and a faint smile hovering on his lips as he looked at her, sleepy and content. "Morning," she whispered.

The smile grew, "Morning." He twisted over and kissed her firmly on the lips. Syd allowed herself to fall into the kiss, deepening it, their hands moving… Sky stopped suddenly and looked at the breaking dawn. "Shit, we're meant to be back for our shift soon." Syd groaned and let her head drop to his chest once more. Sky laughed and tossed her her shirt. "You're going to need this." She stuck her tongue out at him as they both moved, muscles aching in a pleasant protest. Once dressed they made their way back to the road and Sky's temperamental truck, hands entwined as both were loathe to lose physical contact with the other.

_--XxX--_

Syd sighed as the memories faded. That summer had been wonderful and Syd wouldn't have exchanged it for anything, not even now she knew how it would end. She shifted position and her legs screamed in agony; she hadn't moved from the kneeling position for a while and pins and needles ran down to her feet as the blood supply returned. Not wishing to risk the pain of standing, Syd shuffled until her back rested against the bed and her legs were straightened in front of her. The piece of paper that had fallen from her jeans was still clutched in her hand and she once again found old memories resurfacing…

_--XxX--_

Summer had ended early that year. If June and July had been hot, then August had been stifling. Temperatures had soared causing endless work for the rangers. Crime rates had dropped, with even New Tech's undesirables unwilling to venture out in the heat, but forest fires had kept SPD on its toes. Not normally used as a fire-fighting organisation, the size and scale of some of the blazes had required more expert help and the rangers' refurbished zords had come in handy. As the end of August loomed, it brought with it a break in the weather. Thunderstorms had plagued the city for days, cooling the air and bringing much needed rain to the parched earth. After they had died down, the sun returned but it lacked the intensity it had previously held and there was a cool chill to the air, especially in the mornings, a sure hint that autumn was approaching. Nature, like all things, requires balance. After burning so fiercely, the summer heat had now died down to a glowing ember. Daytimes though were still pretty warm and it always got unbearably hot just before a downpour.

Syd could still remember that day so visibly. The feel of the breeze on her face, the smell of the approaching rain mingled with the arid scent of the tarred roof, the storm clouds darkening the horizon, the droplet of sweat that ran down the back of her neck, tracing a damp line between her shoulder blades; everything stood out stark and clear in her memory, like lightning flashes against a dark background.

Sky had asked her to meet him on the roof that afternoon. Later, she wished she could have said she'd known it was coming, that there had been some signs. She wanted to think that Sky had been acting odd for days; that because she was so caught up in him and in their relationship that she just hadn't noticed it; that it had been an oversight on her part. But the truth was that Sky had been fine, had seemed fine, with nothing, _nothing_ to hint at what was to come. So when he asked her to meet him she'd assumed it was, well, a lover's rendezvous and hadn't questioned it. Syd had arrived there first and had stood with her arms on the parapet looking out over the city, bathed in a warm golden glow. But there were dark clouds to the south and the faint hint of rain on the air as the breeze pushed them slowly towards New Tech. An omen, as Syd thought later. The door behind her opened and Sky appeared. Afterwards, she would remember the look on his face but that day she didn't. Syd walked over to him and reached up to encircle his neck with her arms, her lips pressing firmly against his. Sky didn't respond. It was only when she pulled back that Sky's expression registered with her. The red ranger's face was serious, but in his eyes Syd saw a flicker of some unknown emotion. Was it sadness? Fear? Relief? She would never know. Whatever it was, it caused her to take another step back, her heart already beginning to plummet. "What's wrong?" she asked. The young man didn't answer and Syd unexpectedly felt nervous. "Sky, what's happened?" Suddenly images of something bad having happened, perhaps something to Bridge or Z… No, she'd seen them earlier… Her parents? Sky's mother? Thoughts rushed into her head in a swirl and she fought to remain calm.

As if sensing her panic, Sky finally spoke, "I've been accepted to the Tokkyou division." He said it simply, with no feeling in his voice.

Relief flooded through Syd and she laughed, "Oh Sky, for a second I thought you were going to give me bad news. This is wonderful, congratulations." Tokkyou were the special branch of SPD, highly trained and to be invited to join them was a rare honour. She made to hug him but Sky raised his arms to ward her off.

"I leave tonight," he said, then swallowed hard. "Syd, about us… We can't be together."

Puzzlement and hurt flashed over her face, "Wha… what? Why?" The panic rose again as she realised what he'd said. He was leaving.

"I've got at least a year of training on their base, which if you've forgotten is in the Lima Quadrant, only a few hundred light years away from Earth and then there's no guarantee I'll get posted back to Earth once my training is complete. Technically they could send me anywhere in the galaxy." There was a harshness to his tone that Syd had never heard before.

She bit her lip and took a couple of deep breaths before steadying herself enough to speak, "Sky, we can work it out. There's the videophone and email and I could come and visit for your time off…"

"Don't be ridiculous." The words were snapped out, anger barely controlled behind them. A frown creased Sky's face as he looked at her, as if he thought she was talking nonsense. Perhaps she was.

But Syd didn't care. She couldn't lose him. "Sky, we can try. Please. Please don't do this. Not after everything." She was crying now, tears blurring her vision so she could barely see, running unrestrained down her cheeks, the lump in her throat pressing so painfully against her windpipe that she could hardly speak, "Please. This summer has been so good. We can work it out, we can-"

"I can't." Sky cut in. "I'm sorry Syd. This summer has been amazing…" He paused, whether to regain his own balance or to simply think of what to say next Syd couldn't tell, "But all good things come to an end. This has to end, now. I leave in a couple of hours." Another pause, then a quieter, "I'm sorry," before he turned and made to walk away.

"Sky stop!" Syd almost yelled. The red ranger did, with his back to her, the sunlight cutting harsh shadows across his face. She took another deep breath and willed her legs to stop shaking as she wiped a hand across her face. "Please Sky. I… I love you."

There was silence on the rooftop. The breeze blew harder, pulling at their clothes and whipping Syd's hair around her face, and to the south the storm clouds began to race towards the city. Sky's shoulders seemed to sag and he half turned to look at her. "I'm sorry Syd. I don't," he said and then opened the door and disappeared down the stairs back into the base. The metal door swung shut behind him with a final, unyielding bang.

Syd's legs gave way and she sank to the floor, sobs wracking her body. The lump seemed to explode from her chest and she drew herself into a ball, crying hysterically. Sky had left her, and done it so completely that there was nothing she could do to change it. Syd hated stuff she couldn't change, and this was beyond her power to alter. A scream escaped her lips, but there was no one around to hear it, except Mother Nature. The breeze was no longer a gentle touch on the skin, but a fierce wind that began to whistle across the rooftops of the city. The sky had darkened to an angry grey and the first rumbles of thunder could be heard. As Syd's tears began to subside, the first heavy, hot drops of rain started to fall. Her pain gave way to rage and sudden strength rushed through her. Standing, she lashed out at anything within range, at the pipes and brick walls that made up the rooftop. Fists smashed against the stone and she threw a furious roundhouse kick at a metal duct, only achieving a slight dent and a bruised shin. Another scream, this one of frustration, anger and pain broke from her as she slammed her fist against the wall again and again. Her powers were unused, knuckles scrapping against the rough surface, tearing the skin and causing blood to well up in the wounds and run across her hands, leaving red trails on the brickwork. She didn't feel any pain from them. The rain fell faster, soaking her to the skin and the storm broke in earnest, lightning crackling across the sky, sudden flashes of brilliance in the encroaching darkness. A louder crash of thunder got through to Syd and she stood, shaking, her chest heaving with each gasping breath she took. The fury left her as suddenly as it had come. She stumbled over to the parapet and sagged against the wall, the wet brick still warm from the earlier sun, looking out over the storm-drenched city. She had no idea how long she sat there, watching the lighting flash over the buildings and distant countryside, but by the time she thought to move the storm was dying down and night had fallen, the setting sun obscured by the clouds and forgotten by the rain-soaked residents of New Tech. She got up slowly, her stiff muscles cramped from sitting so long in the same position. The rain had washed most of the blood off her hands and the cuts on the knuckles had stopped bleeding, reduced to painful scabs that cracked and wept when she tried to flex her fingers. She was sure she must have broken at least one.

Syd made her way down the stairs and through the corridors of the base, heading for her private quarters. She tried to ignore the strange looks she was getting from the staff and fellow cadets, tried to ignore what a sight she must look, drenched to the skin with red-rimmed eyes and bloodied hands. She reached her room and hurried in, shutting the door behind her.

Z was sitting on her bed, flicking through a magazine, but looked up when Syd entered. As soon as she saw the condition the young woman was in, the yellow ranger flung herself up off the bed and went over to her. "Oh Syd, are you alright? What happened to you?"

"Sky broke up with me," Syd whispered numbly, her pain and anger being replaced by a dull, sick feeling in the pit of her stomach. "He's going to Tokkyou."

"I know," Z said, sadness on her own face. "He told the rest of us about ten minutes before he left." There was a flash of anger in her eyes that showed the brown haired woman's own feelings to their red ranger's new appointment, and his treatment of her friend.

"He's gone?" Syd sat on the edge of her bed, the news not sparking the rush of emotion she thought it would. A feeling of emptiness began to flood through her. Z, worry clear on her face, sat down next to her and, spontaneously pulled her into a tight hug. Syd started to cry quietly, with none of the hysterics of before, and Z merely held her close, stroking her hair and muttering soft words of comfort to the distraught young woman.

_XxX_

September had been one of the worst months of Syd's life. In a way, she was glad Sky wasn't on Earth to see her like that. She oscillated between floods of tears and outbursts of violent anger. In the end, Cruger had called her into his office and told her in no uncertain terms if she didn't pull herself together then her active ranger status would be revoked. Syd had instantly managed to get her emotions in control, at least during the day and while on duty. B-Squad had lost two red rangers in the space of months and had gained yet another new member in the form of yellow ranger Sean. Bridge had been promoted to red and Z to blue, but the team was still finding its feet and another shake up didn't bear thinking about. So for the next five months, in public at least, Syd was the perfect cadet. But nothing felt the same to her anymore, and the job she had once loved became dull and empty. A sudden urge to get away, away from SPD, away from New Tech, away from Earth overcame her. She spent another month, drifting listlessly through her duties before finally speaking to Kat. The technician understood instantly and had a quiet word with Cruger who arranged for Syd to be temporarily transferred to the SPD Academy on Limus-6 as one of their instructors. It was only meant to be for a year.

Across the galaxy, Sky had completed his training at Tokkyou, passing out of the academy with flying colours. After spending a year stationed on the outer planets, he had been reassigned to Earth, New Tech City branch. Syd had heard all this from a chance meeting with another Tokkyou who had been in Sky's squad and assigned to Limus-6. When she had introduced herself to him as Sydney Drew, the first thing he had said was "Captain Tate's Syd?" During their conversations Syd suspected that the Tokkyou, Captain Philips, knew more about her and Sky's relationship than he was letting on, but she could never prove it. As she made ready for her return to Earth, Philips had said something cryptic to her that she could neither figure out nor forget. "He did care about you Syd, in his own manner. Leaving you the way he did was his way of showing it."

Now, three years after she had left, she too had returned to SPD.

_--XxX--_

Syd sighed from where she remained sat on the floor. Finally dragging her mind away from the past, she refolded her jeans and placed them back into the box which was shoved back under her bed. The piece of paper was tucked away in the rear pocket of her pants and she finished putting away her stuff before turning to the pile of discarded clothes and magazines in the middle of her room. Grabbing a couple of black bin bags she had brought in just for this purpose, she shoved her old belongings into them and made her way down through the busy corridors to chuck them in the recycling bins. Taking a deep breath of the cool night air she felt a weight lift from her shoulders, almost as if she was throwing away her old worries with her old stuff. A smile ghosted across her face and she turned to walk back to her room. The halls of SPD were comfortingly familiar and she let her feet remember their own way towards her quarters. A sign next to one of the doors she passed made her stop. CAPTAIN TATE. She froze for a second, as Philips' words came back to her. _He did care about you_… Impulsively Syd pulled the crumpled paper out of her pocket and barely paused to reread the words on it; she already knew them by heart. It was a letter she had written to Sky just before she left SPD. She had never sent it. He had never read it, until now. Hurriedly smoothing it out she folded it neatly and tucked it under his door before walking quickly away, refusing to look back lest she change her mind.

She never saw the door slid silently open behind her, nor the hand, partially covered by a long red shirt-sleeve, reach down to pick up the letter and unfold it. Syd's neat writing still stood out stark black against the aged white paper, neat and clear for him to read:

_When you think Tim McGraw, I hope you think of my favorite song. Someday perhaps you'll turn your radio on and I hope it takes you back to that place. I hope you think of that little black dress, think of my head on your chest and my old faded blue jeans. Remember the moon like a spotlight on the lake and staying there all night long.  
When you think happiness, I hope you think of me. x_

**The End.**


End file.
